Freedom is the Cost of Power?

Is freedom/power a false dichotomy?

I have always craved for more influence and power at my workplace. I was fortunate; I never had to work too hard for it. I got noticed but this never gave rise to blind favoritism. I got what I deserved. But what I have noticed happening so often was that my freedom was respected. At times this bugged me a lot because I was not called to meetings or plans or discussions. I met the project deadlines and always made my team do more than what was expected. I got my holidays whenever I wanted them. I could walk out of office at any time no matter where I was working and what place.

But power and influence does not mean all these things. I should be eating with bigwigs, with enemies may be, who can advance my career. Gaining power, according to research by Pfeffer and others, is mostly a matter of building relationships with people you don’t necessarily like, i.e. taking on many, many obligations, social and otherwise.

Don’t I want to take these obligations? Even after promotions and raises which I have periodically received in the organizations I have worked with, I am not part of what I really want to be. As my boss says it takes time to get the faith out of people. I have never been the working right hand of the bigshots. I don’t want them only to give me lifts in their cars or have dinner /lunch or coffee with me or just dance with me or hug me or flirt with me. I want to be their Manfriday…I want to work with them and become part of their successes. It cannot come with time. They have to let me start sometime.

Generally, lunching with enemies and bigwigs is not considered the most fun to have in the afternoon, but according to the evidence it’s what it takes to claw one’s way to the top, and it’s non-optional. The truly ambitious are not free to choose a solo sandwich in the park. I just don’t know what to do in my current organization. I am single, staying away from family and I have so much of freedom and time. But I know for sure that this freedom will vanish as soon as I’ll have a family. I have tried to utilize it by studying, learning, reading and what not…but I wish my boss made me her right hand. And if I am really her right hand that means I have access to so many things…:)